He was becoming consistently predictable, he thought in exasperation as he found himself parked in front of the Christmas store for the third night in a row. He didn't even feel alarmed that he had somehow navigated himself there without any recollection. Of course, kissing Sue senseless before bidding her good night might have something to do with that. He smiled and groaned at the same time, desiring nothing more than to turn his car around and head right back for her.

He wanted her. Now. He didn't think he had the patience required to gently woo her according to his carefully laid out plan. More like seduce her into your bed and keep her there for an eternity. It seemed as if once the chasm of their non-relationship had been bridged there was no holding back the spark that was now rapidly burning into an insatiable fire.

If we’re lucky you’ll keep an ember buried somewhere in there…Jack clutched the vicinity of his heart in wonder. And with luck it’ll stay steady and true, ready for the right spark to fan it to life again…

It occurred to him that Sue was his spark and together they were going to go up in a raging inferno if he didn’t figure out how to bank his desires…and hers. He looked around in embarrassment, feeling a bit silly clutching his heart in the middle of the street. Sue was making him lose his mind, he surmised. Hearing voices inside his head. Seeing pictures of eerily familiar little girls. One that you remember so vividly that you're sure you've met her before.

His mind was definitely playing tricks on him because the photograph he’d seen tonight was Sue as a child and she had lived in Ohio and he had grown up in Wisconsin. Even though they had met in DC as adults, he still had the nagging feeling in the back of his mind that they had met before...He'd grilled her on that picture, at first amusing and then baffling her with the intensity of his questions. She had answered as best she could -- mostly vague memories that miraculously matched some of his long forgotten ones. This, of course was impossible. He knew that. But he had still asked her if she'd ever gone to Wisconsin as a child. Started listing family friends and relatives that they might have mutually known and somehow ended up with sometime ago when she was eight and he was twelve. For how else could he have recognized the child in the picture?

…but this will all fade away until it isn’t even a distant memory, mark my words.

The voice sounded so real that he turned his head, expecting to see a man standing next to him, but no one was there. Shrugging away a chill that crept up his back, he passed through the door of the Christmas Store barely noticing the gay peel of bell ringing that heralded his entrance. He was so deep in thought that he failed to notice the mysteriously vanishing personnel, leaving the store empty save for the pleasant faced white haired proprietress.

"Landsakes, boy, but you're a go-getter when you put your mind to something," she sighed, "as if I didn't have enough to do with the deadline approaching. What can I help you with now?" her tone was not as chipper as the firmly pasted smile on her face.

"I don't know," Jack admitted sheepishly. "I think I'll just take a look around...you're still open, aren't you?"

"For you? Apparently always. Hanging on your every whim. Balancing on the precipice of your floundering mind. Waiting in anticipation for that bolt of clarity to pierce that handsome but oh so thick skull..."

Great post!!!! I just love the scenes in the Christmas Store!



So Funny!

yep really to funny...jack how can you not remember...after the letter and that photo

I'm so glad. I never want to disappoint you. And yes, I'd love even the Jack you mentioned....just not quite in the same way! EWWWWWWWWWWWW

And yet we still love him!

Maybe Mrs. C needs to get her purse out. I'm a firm believer in a whack upside the head. I don't really think it could hurt in Jack's case, do you?

Jack - is it possible for one oh-so-adorably-handsome man to be so clueless?!?

o man it just keeps getting better and better!

Jack, it was totally Sue! I mean, who else could it be, right Jack?

Yes it is....

~laura michelle~

You did it again, using the words "kissing Sue senseless". I love that! What a great line! I love it, love it, love it!!!

Another fantastic post!!!!

I'm not so sure we want to whack Jack on the head - I think if he remembered it all suddenly it would scare the living daylights out of him!

I put my tree up and I would love to visit the Christmas store - do they gift wrap? Do they automatically help your family members pick things that may seem practical but you still really want them? Questions Kav so many questions!

Is Mrs. C getting a little tired of Jack's cluelessness? Or maybe it's how slow he is? Tell her that's okay. We know how she feels.

I love Jack ends up back to the store ... now, he is FBI agent ... how long is it supposed to take him to add all the clues together?

Love the story, Kav!

I'm feeling better today ... how about you?

LOL! Oh Jack, you can be quite clueless at times.

Kav I hope that today finds you ( and Everyone Else) feeling better.

I have enjoyed this story so much, I love that Jack is remembering things will the rest of the team remember also? I hope so. Can't wait for more.

Dianna

"I don't know," Jack admitted sheepishly. "I think I'll just take a look around...you're still open, aren't you?"

"For you? Apparently always. Hanging on your every whim. Balancing on the precipice of your floundering mind. Waiting in anticipation for that bolt of clarity to pierce that handsome but oh so thick skull..."
[/quote]


the whole post was fantastic but this had me howling with laughter

cath

Ok I have a day off sick...and you know I think I'm going to enjoy every second of it...just about ten pages in and loving every bit of it...

I was so sure that Jack would catch on right away, but I guess not. Well, that's our Jack.

i just pulled an all nighter writing a research paper on the benefits of preschool so forgive me if i nap while you post.

Perfect Kav!!!!!

Jen

I think that Mrs. C might be the one to whack Jack up side the head

Em

Let's think about this for a moment....

Yes, Jack is a special agent, but how many cases did we actually see where HE put everything together and solved it before any of his teammates did?




Seems to me, he usually has to rely on Sue's super skills of lip-reading and her instincts as well as Tara's super sleuth skills on the computer.

Maybe he should pull Tara in to help out with more of his 'memories' she did pretty well with the bell....




KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAV!

Enough about clueless boy... give him some time to figure it out! I wanna know if Bobby really had a pet kangaroo.... in my story he had a pet dingo....

**throws mini tantrum** Tara has questions too.... and I'm sure that if Bobby remembers he'll want to know if she can still do cartwheels..... **blinks innocently**

jack sure does know how to utilize the fact that he's god's gift to women.

if it wasnt for that gorgeous skull ( and hair, and teeth, and eyes, and body...) he would never be where he is now....

"For you? Apparently always. Hanging on your every whim. Balancing on the precipice of your floundering mind. Waiting in anticipation for that bolt of clarity to pierce that handsome but oh so thick skull..."
[/quote]

Have to say thats a very funny line...oh and I had forgotten how adorable our hero is. Glad to see you are still giving Jack, every opportunity to be as indecisive as ever.

LOL....you always make me laugh...

your point being that ... as a BOBBY/TARA FAN.... you support my angle of need to know basis on Kav's story right?


and I have a NEED TO KNOW if he had a pet kangaroo....

Poor Jack, he's not that bad is he? I mean, he's progressing famously along the romance line...it's just that clear, logical planning mind that's balking at the thought of...well, all that fantasy stuff. He's much to practical for fairy tales, don't you think? If I don't ease him in to the whole idea I might end up giving him a heart attack and then where will Sue be?

It was snowing outside; a smattering of fluffy flakes that brightened the slushy streets in a fresh gown of white lace. As a boy he had loved to stand on the verge of their gardens after a snowfall; enjoyed seeing the way the snow sparkled like diamonds and covered the plants and flowers he loved so much in a shroud of white. He loved the brightness of the snow the most and the welcoming light it offered even on the darkest of nights.

To this day he hated to disturb the pristine beauty by marring it with ugly footprints. His sister hadn’t minded one bit though. She would throw herself onto the ground miming grotesque shapes with squeals of laughter until the uniformed beauty was ruined. He never gave in to her strident pleas to join in her game of frozen statues, but would watch silently from the sidelines until their nanny would finally allow him to go inside. He still preferred the indoors with a fire lit and the lights on and the melodic strains of classical music to ease away the darkness of night.

And yet here he was enclosed in his car, the muted strains of a violin concerto flooding the silence outside. The snow muffled the street noises, not that there were many this time of night. He was parked on a side street off a side street, looking out at a few small family run businesses that eked out a living in the shadows of the big conglomerates that built the office towers. The skyscrapers dwarfed the little one and two story buildings, but they didn't seem to mind. Still decked out for the season with incredible care, they seemed to flaunt their diminutive size in defiant gaudy glory.

It made Myles smile. The whole street was picturesque; an old fashioned tailor, a shoe repair shop, a wool store and the brazenly lit up Christmas Store. He wondered if that one did any business at all during the off season. Probably. He snorted derisively. People never failed to amaze him with their willingness to get sucked into the holiday frenzy. As quaint as that store looked, it clearly had it's coffers in the current market trends, for like everything else, it appeared to Myles as if Santa had gone 24/ 7 when it came to closing a sale.

He wasn't sure now when he first came upon the store. A couple of weeks anyhow. He'd ended up on the road after his usual route home from the Hoover building ran a detour. Intrigued, he had come to simply observe on more than one occasion. He noted that customers rarely left empty-handed. While not booming, the little store certainly seemed to have a steady business. He had never gone inside, of course, because he had no need. Who would he buy a fancy Christmas bauble for? His sister, Anne, wasn't much of a reveler. Truthfully, neither of them were. Their parents had seen to that at an early age. Instead, they exchanged cards and donated a monetary sum to a pet charity in the other’s name. Sue had thought that wonderfully altruistic of him but in reality, it was simply easier for him to write a check and post it then to try and figure out what his sister would want for Christmas.

He glanced at his watch, noting with surprise the lateness of the hours. Nearly midnight. He’d been keeping his vigil for over two hours now. He wasn't certain why he hovered on the outskirts of this quiet lane, feeling like an outsider with his nose pressed against the windowpane. It had become something of a ritual. Not quite nightly, but enough so that he was beginning to question his sanity -- which went along with hearing bells and the fear of darkness that seemed to resurface from his childhood.

He'd heard about agents who suddenly snapped under the stress of their job. It never happened after the difficult, life-threatening, bone-chilling cases, though. It snuck up on a man during the quiet lulls that interspersed them and he was beginning to think he was about to become one of the statistics. So he stayed late several nights a week, meticulously finishing off loose ends just incase he lost his mind in the night. And then he ended up here watching…for what, he wasn’t sure.

He smiled sardonically. More proof that he was losing it? He had to face the facts after all. Old fears had resurfaced with a vengeance. Just the day before the sight of a toy train making its way laboriously around a toy store window had him breaking out in a cold sweat. And sleeping with the light on? Manning would have a field day with that one. And now there were annoying memories -- at least that's what he thought they were -- of children whom he somehow misconstrued to be his team and a little girl who gave him more than anyone ever had one night long ago. A childish voice imploring him to share his Christmas memories and when she found out he didn’t have any, she had flooded his mind with the brightness of her own. These fragmented memories occupied his mind more and more lately, and left him tonight, staring blankly out into the new fallen snow, wondering if he really was losing his mind.

Disgusted with his lapse into melancholy, he was about to call it an evening when a car he recognized pulled into a parking spot ahead of him. Jack Hudson hopped out, mindless of the messy way he disturbed the new fallen snow as he plowed his way right into the Christmas store without a backward glance. Intrigued, Myles followed.

tsk tsk tsk... myles is being nosy again... BUT maybe he'll help Jack figure it out?

It's terrible to hear how he grew up... but all in all... I think we all kinda realized that.


Um... Kav? um... Kangaroo?... Cartwheels.... ????


As previously stated..... I have NEED TO KNOW clearance....

How deep is that snow? What the heck...I'll follow even if I don't have boots handy!

Jill

Jack, you disturbed the snow!

See, I knew you and Myles shared a brain on some level because that's the only way you could have even captured his view of snow. (which I, for one, share)

I want snow. We haven't had any yet and it doesn't feel Christmasy. Thanks for sending a little my way by cyber space.

Hope you're feeling better. This was beautiful.

What an insight into Myles....very cool....

~laura michelle~

Since I happen to know that Flip is in a meeting right now and not able to reply just yet, I can beat her to this .... I LOVE this description of Jack. A boyish, carefree, mind-on-his-mission Jack... *dreamy sigh*

And your insight into Myles makes me wonder if you've got him hidden somewhere and you bring him out to consult as to his motives and thoughts. Absolutely brilliant!!!

I love Myles And I am so glad he is following Jack... I'm going to follow too

Em

I'm right behind you Jill!

Donna

I wonder what Jack will say when he sees Myles there?

Oh boy! This is about to get really interesting. Myles and Jack in the Christmas store. You had better watch out Mrs. C!

Kim

Oh, I can just imagine Myles' interaction with Mrs. C. The witty remarks would be flying. I think Mrs. C. could give Myles a run for his money in that department.


Looking forward to more!

I've got boots, mittens, hats, snow pants, scarves and all other winter apparel piled in front of the door so I would follow but I can't get out!

That was one of the most beautiful scenes you have ever written!

Ah, yes, carefree, giddy, 'mind-on-his-mission' Jack. (Only I'm not so sure he knows what his mission is (at least at the Christmas store!))

And now Myles is on his way inside. I wonder how many of the others have found it and just not ventured inside yet. I wonder when they'll all meet up there and each have a clarifying moment that will light up the city block? I wonder when Kav is going to give us more?????

I'm right behind them. Mrs C will be so impressed to see two of them

i'm back, rested and ready to read more and super excited about Myles and Jack meeting together in the store maybe some more of the group will show up and something magicall will happen

Kav I can't wait to see what you've got in store for us next....maybe a little magic dust, everyone meeting in the same store at the same time, transporting them back to that time when they were all innocent.....oooohhh I can't wait!

It seems like their memories of that fateful night are coming back tiny bit by tiny bit and i feel like that night might turn them into a better team. They've been destined to be together, it seems.

i'm going to follow them....i wanna know what's going on in there. ... i think myles is going to love it...

Jack wandered around the store aimlessly, painfully aware of Mrs. C's impatient stare. Maybe she should switch to the day shift, he thought, she might like it better. Probably goes to work in the dark and comes home in the dark. That would be wearing, especially on an old lady.

Her eyes fairly crackled at him from across the room, as if she had read his mind. "I'll have you know, young man, that old is not in my vocabulary!"

Jack’s eyebrows raised in surprise and he squirmed in embarrassment. She had the uncanny grade school teacher’s knack of mind reading and it was disconcerting, especially since he was trying to concentrate on purchasing something for Sue.

Mrs. C sighed and put her sewing aside. “I’m no more a clairvoyant than you are,” she retorted, immediately disproving her words. “You don’t have a poker face, my boy. I can read you like an open book.”

She had come to stand beside him and Jack noted with surprise that she barely reached his shoulder. Quite elf-like in an ample girth kind of way.

“On my father’s side,” she seemed to be confirming his thoughts with a nod of her head. “Mixed marriage – not always the easiest kind. When people come from such varied backgrounds…or have obvious differences that might prove…difficult to mesh.”

“Like Sue and I,” Jack blurted out, a little shocked at how easily Mrs. C had pinned his deep-rooted anxiety.

The old lady nodded complacently. “She’s a special one. Carries the Spirit of Christmas in her heart all year round. Not everyone does you know.”

Jack’s face softened as his mind turned to the many gentle ways Sue had spread warmth and light amongst friends and coworkers…and complete strangers if truth be told…since he had known her. Undoubtedly she had been doing it her entire life.

“Don’t you see? He doesn’t have any memories of his own? He can’t fight it alone!” A little girl perched precariously over a gaping precipice, reaching out her hand to…

Jack shook his head in bemusement. It was almost there – the shadows in his mind growing sharper in his consciousness. It had something to do with Sue. He knew it had something to do with her – something important just out of reach. His groan was audible and Mrs. C patted his arm sympathetically.

“It hurts doesn’t it? Expanding the mind to accept what’s lurking in the shadows. Sometimes it’s good and sometimes it’s bad, but it’s always a worthwhile exercise. Hot chocolate, dear? A few sugar cookies? They always help clear my head.”

Jack accepted the blue snowflake cup pressed into his hand and automatically reached for a sugar sprinkled reindeer but ended up with a bell instead. He studied it thoughtfully.

“It’s to remember me by.”

“Take a bite dear, you’d be amazed at the restorative powers in a good cookie.”

Jack sank his teeth into the plump treat, savoring the compliment of texture and flavour as the sweet melted on his tongue.

Magic.

“I’m afraid I’ll drag her down,” he admitted softly, not daring to look into the kindly eyes peering up at him. “You talked about differences. Sue and I – we’re so different. She…believes…and I…I question everything. I’m too pragmatic to let my emotions play a part in a case and yet Sue often gets better results because she does.” The gates to clarity seemed to have just burst open and Jack couldn’t stop himself if he wanted to. But he didn’t. These doubts, his self-recrimination had clung to his soul like a dark splotch of tar, too sticky to remove. The more it clung, the more it grew and sometimes he found himself looking across the bullpen and worrying that he might just be more like Leland than he cared to admit. “This last case…I let her down. Badly. I ignored what I felt here,” he gave the vicinity of his heart a punishing punch, “and practically turned my back on her…I did. I ignored her feelings, began second-guessing her responses…I failed her and in doing so failed myself.”

“Does Sue agree with this summation?” Mrs. C prompted gently when Jack lapsed into silence.

He shook his head. “You know her, she believes…” he stopped in astonishment. Why would he assume that Mrs. C knew Sue? And yet he knew she did, perhaps better than he did.

“I hurt her, dredging up a part of my past that I find I’m not very proud of…a part, at first that I almost boasted over. I was shocked when Jessica showed up in the bullpen that day. I thought I’d put aside all the feelings I once had for her, but I just followed where she led. Inexcusable, especially since in the end she turned…” He couldn't bring himself to say the word. He didn’t have to. Mrs. C understood.

“She let the darkness consume her long ago, Jack. You might comfort yourself in knowing that It’s ways are subtle and conniving and those with special hearts often have difficulty comprehending It’s consuming attraction.”

Jack shook his head, unwilling to forgo the blame. “I should have known. Recognized the signs.”

“Ah, Jessica still has a hold over you,” Mrs. Claus surmised sadly.

“No!” Jack objected vehemently. “She’s…” he shuddered, unable to verbalize the repulsion and disappointment he felt when he thought of his former girlfriend.

“But she’s still holding onto your heart,” Mrs. C reprimanded gently.

“No. Sue has my heart. She has had for a long time. I love her!”

“Oh, I didn’t say you loved Jessica, Jack, just that the stain of her darkness hasn’t left your heart. You need to set yourself free, dear.” Mrs. C pressed another cookie into his hand. Another bell intricately decorated with silver balls and piped with white icing.

“…don’t go breaking hearts – yours is already taken.”

The voice inside his head held the same kind and complacent tone of the old lady standing in front of him. She sighed up at him.

“Have you talked to Sue about these feelings?” Mrs. C didn’t wait for an answer. “Of course you haven’t. You’re a prime example of the alpha male if ever there was one. I saw that in you as a boy. Taking charge, looking out for others weaker than you, always wanting to be the one to solve the problem.”

“I just don’t want to hurt her any more,” Jack said gruffly.

“Oh, and was that what you were doing this evening, young man?” Mrs. C eyed him slyly.

Heat flooded his face as visions of Sue sprawled beneath him on the couch danced through his mind and he crammed the entire cookie into his mouth to avoid answering her pointed question. Nearly choking on the crumbs, he was spared her amused stare as she thumbed him on the back, dislodging several silver balls and a large wedge of cookie.

“Mr. C was right, Jack. You do have a good heart. Don’t forget that and try listening to it more often and you’ll get along fine. You aren’t so different from Sue as you think. Now, I’m glad we’ve had this little chat but you need to apply yourself to your shopping. I’ve a feeling time is of the essence for you tonight.”

Kav, I've been away for more than a week and am trying to catch up!! So sorry to hear that you have been sick - hope you are starting to feel better!!!

I am only on page 27, but I had to stop and reply!! MAGIC - it has to be shown in capitals because even capitalized it doesn't come close to describing this story!! I am reading along and getting shivers and goosebumps with every post!! You're amazing, Kav!!!

Joy

Offering mouth to mouth resuscitation one hopes!

I was just watching a rerun of ER..and I have you know that Jessica is safely stashed away in the Congo....still being uppity..but shes changed professions..now a surgeon..lets hope shes not after Carter! I wonder if MI5 knows thats shes escaped from her prison cell?

Mrs. C is just too funny, and the way she handles Jack...

And what does that mean - 'time is of the essence for him tonight'? Should I be worried?

I have the feeling that the magic of christmas will reveal all.

The whole conversation between Jack and Mrs. C was just ..... well...... Perfect!

Kav, your writing ability amazes me. Waiting impatiently for your next post.