Flip: 
sorry -- but aren't puppies cute? And chickenpotpie, they're not on the Polar Express now...they were when they were children...and maybe they will be again... 
Sorry only one post today. Jonah has indeed become my shadow...in fact, I think he is stalking me! 
Poor Myles! Sue could tell he was nervous. He'd barely touched his lunch, though they'd gone to his favourite deli. It was all she could do to coax him into eating a light salad and drinking some water.
"Milk is bad for a singer before a performance, did you know that?" he had asked with a panicked look in his eye. "I don't know why, but it appears to be a known fact. I'll have to get Tara to research it for me." He blanched suddenly and looked at his salad in horror. "Ranch dressing -- that has dairy in it, doesn't it? Milk by-products. You don't think it should be banned from my diet too?" After that she couldn't get him to eat another thing.
He was well on his way to becoming the most stage-frightened person she had ever seen when she suggested they take a walk in the park. Levi needed a break before they went back to the church. It promised to be crowded and he would be scrunched beneath a pew for the better part of two hours.
"Rehearsal went well," she ventured as she tossed a stick for Levi to chase. "The best you've ever done."
Myles rolled his eyes in exasperation. "And this is high praise indeed coming from the deaf woman!"
Sue smiled, serenely unperturbed. "I can read lips, Myles, and I saw what they said. You have nothing to worry about."
"Says the lady who won't have to suffer through my caterwauling," Myles retorted.
Sue recognized the beginning signs of a royal snit. The old Myles didn't surface often any more, but stress was a known instigator. She also thought he was secretly regretting his decision to keep the rest of the team away. She decided to tackle that one first.
"It isn't too late to call everyone. They could still make it in time," she suggested brightly.
"They wouldn't want to come, even if they knew," Myles mumbled with his head bent low so that Sue had to tilt her head to see what he was saying.
She pulled out her blackberry. "We won't know until we try, will we?" She made a move to dial the first number but Myles' hand closed around her wrist.
"No." It was a stark entreaty and Sue looked up at him in concern.
"They'll regret not being here, Myles," she assured him softly. "It would be a nice Christmassy thing to do together."
"I...can't, Sue. I'm sorry. I don't want to disappoint you but..." How could he explain the sheer terror that engulfed him at the thought of coming under their scrutiny? The roots were in his past, he was sure of it; a past that he was only reluctantly beginning to be able to confront. And the bright light leading him out of the tunnel of darkness was standing right here in front of him. He was almost tempted to say yes just to please her. Almost. He shook his head instead.
Like the angel she was, she didn't press him, just calmly pocketed her blackberry and picked up the stick Levi had dropped at her feet. She threw it again and they commenced walking. Myles envied her serenity while he was a jangle of nerves. Not all of them were because of the concert looming in his very near future though. He held a few in reserve for the small parcel he had purchased last night at the store. The one he had carefully wrapped this morning with crisp folds and neat tucks in gold embossed paper, decked with a ribbon and a bow. He had been excited then -- and filled with more anticipation then he'd ever been over the prospect of presenting a gift to anybody. But now he had cold feet and he wished he'd left the present anonymously in her car or forgone it all together.
"We'd better get back to the church. It's almost time," Sue broke the silence of their stroll and touched his hand comfortingly. "You can do this Myles and you're going to be magnificent. You'll capture the emotions of the song and fill our hearts with Christmas hope. It's your gift."
She made it sound so simple that he almost believed her. And that was dangerous.
"I appreciate the sentiment, Sue and your vote of confidence, but you and I both know that you're not the best judge of how well I'll do in there." He nodded his head towards the church across the street. The parking lot was already full and a line up was beginning to form at the front doors. This was an annual event that marked the official beginning of the season for many loyal parishioners and residents alike. Myles took one look at their smiling, happy faces and wanted to vomit.
Sue could tell he was on the verge of running. She wouldn't blame if he did. He didn't realize how much more was at stake here than just Myles Leland the Third singing in a simple church choir. She'd prayed fervently all week that it would become so much more. She wanted to embrace him with her confidence, but knew that he had to build it on his own. She hoped today would become a sturdy foundation for something wonderful to grow from.
He waited a bit impatiently for her to leash Levi and she took him by surprise when she reached past him to place her hand against his heart. Even though he wore a coat he was sure she could feel it thundering and he knew it was useless to hide the terror that wanted to consume him.
"Myles," she chided so softly he had to duck his head to hear past the downtown street sounds. "I may not be able to hear what your voice sounds like, but I can feel the way it comes from your heart...and it's glorious. Just let it out, Myles and you'll bless us all."
He was touched and he blinked back moisture in his eyes. The wind and some grit -- that was the cause of the tears that threatened to spill in the most unmanly manner. Her eyes were full too and he felt a spark jolt his chest and a warmth surround his heart. His dark terror was replaced with confusion and then awe and he knew he had been in this place before with Sue reaching out to him. She was good at chasing the darkness away.
Gruffly, he reached into his coat pocket and pulled out her gift. It was a little worse for wear and the bow was crushed, but he pressed it into her hands and then stammered nervously. "It's not much, but when I saw it I thought of you and I...just wanted you to have it. Go on, you might as well open it."
Surprised, Sue accepted the present and pulled off her glove so that she could use her fingernail to carefully slice through the nearly invisible tape. Myles was a painstaking wrapper and it took her a full minute to unearth the treasure within the golden folds. Impatiently he took over the unwrapping, ripping at the paper that she had been carefully trying to preserve and whisking it away.
"Oh Myles!" She couldn't formulate a sentence, but her delight was evident in her expression.
The warmth that surrounded his heart began to spread through the rest of his body as he beamed down at her. "It's what you represent, Sue. The promise you give to all of us...especially me. I just want you to know how much I appreciate your..." his voice cracked and stuck on the word he barely dared use. "...friendship." Relief flooded through him when she didn't look appalled. "Thank you for helping me with this." he tapped the wooden carving in her hand.
Sue's eyes brimmed with tears as she looked at the crude object d'art. The letters were carved from one piece of wood, each one painted in a rainbow of riotous colours, and then decorated with polka dots and checkerboards, spirals and holly berries. An etching of a little elf danced on the final e.
"It's a bit simple..." Myles began nervously.
"It's simply beautiful! I'll treasure it always. Thank you, Myles!" and she kissed him on the cheek as she hugged that simple word to her. Believe.
That line made me laugh so hard....
I'm ready for some fun, I'm ready for some fun! Super Agent Myles 
preparing to ditch Superduper Agent Hudson 
a not-playing-fair Jack!
)
KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV!!!!!
why don't you.... 
? to help get me what I desparately need and want? (psst... more Bobby and Tara please! )
lol
. But just as I'm becoming completely puddlelated, you used the "D" word! 
waiting here for more?????
caught up on two wonderful post Im hoping sue will 
not sure what this little guy is doing but he seems pretty cool, so there he is.
)
Are you sure you're not having a Job kind of day? 
That along with the word "believe" couldn't have been more perfect. I just bought a "believe" plague and an angel for a friend. That word just conjures up powerful emotions all on its own.